Jim Kirk (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
smartass_captain) wrote2018-10-06 01:37 pm
smartass_captain) wrote2018-10-06 01:37 pm
Entry tags:
Growing Shadows (open thread, tagging boldygoing for sure)
George Kirk is a Starfleet legend for the Federation. A hero to his crew. A good husband and father to his family, or so Jim Kirk has always been told.
The shadow he cast even in death swallowed Jim up before he was even old enough to understand why his mother cried whenever he smiled a certain way. Refused to look at him or even come back to Earth more than she had to while he was young. He tried to fight it, rebel against it. Baring his teeth. Willing to become the antithesis of George Kirk so long as it meant someone would see him. Anyone. It didn't matter who.
To a young James Kirk even being labeled a criminal was better than being labeled as George Kirk's Son.
Pike ruined all of that. Drug Jim right back into that shadow and told him to embrace it. Encompass it. Dared him to be better. An impossible challenge surely. Every struggle Jim waded through made in the gloom of a reputation he could never hope to live up to. When he finally came out the other side and stepped into the light again a year older than his father ever got to be he was lost. His own accomplishments and reputation stood on their own merit but to what end?
"Dammit, I thought I was past all of this."
Thought he'd moved on since arriving in Yorktown. Found a place all his own that he belonged, no matter what George's reputation was. It turns out self awareness can only go so far. Meeting a Norse God who wears your old man's face isn't the sort of thing he'd been prepared for. He has a pile of ignored PINpoint messages staring accusingly up at him from the screen. Jim's been ignoring people for the last few days since his run in with Thor in the Nexus.
Some people are harder to dodge than others, of course. He picks up the device and starts to rifle through everything he's missed.
The shadow he cast even in death swallowed Jim up before he was even old enough to understand why his mother cried whenever he smiled a certain way. Refused to look at him or even come back to Earth more than she had to while he was young. He tried to fight it, rebel against it. Baring his teeth. Willing to become the antithesis of George Kirk so long as it meant someone would see him. Anyone. It didn't matter who.
To a young James Kirk even being labeled a criminal was better than being labeled as George Kirk's Son.
Pike ruined all of that. Drug Jim right back into that shadow and told him to embrace it. Encompass it. Dared him to be better. An impossible challenge surely. Every struggle Jim waded through made in the gloom of a reputation he could never hope to live up to. When he finally came out the other side and stepped into the light again a year older than his father ever got to be he was lost. His own accomplishments and reputation stood on their own merit but to what end?
"Dammit, I thought I was past all of this."
Thought he'd moved on since arriving in Yorktown. Found a place all his own that he belonged, no matter what George's reputation was. It turns out self awareness can only go so far. Meeting a Norse God who wears your old man's face isn't the sort of thing he'd been prepared for. He has a pile of ignored PINpoint messages staring accusingly up at him from the screen. Jim's been ignoring people for the last few days since his run in with Thor in the Nexus.
Some people are harder to dodge than others, of course. He picks up the device and starts to rifle through everything he's missed.
no subject
That, combined with his earlier advice to 'Thor' to have faith in his little brother is almost touching. This is, he thinks, a man worth keeping a friendly eye on, assuming he hasn't yet infuriated him beyond forging an alliance.
"For the record, anything with a corporeal form can be punched, gods included. Just a bit of advice, should it ever come up in your future. The only question is whether the god will take more harm from it, or your fist." He's pretty sure Jane Foster came away with bruises from when she slapped him, but she did knock his head to one side. He's not immune.
"You have every reason to be angry, but it won't do either of us any good at this point," he further points out. "The question is do you prefer I explain your aversion to my brother and encourage him to give you your space, or would you rather I said nothing?"
no subject
It's a little bit satisfying to hear Loki admit Jim's got reason to be mad. Seems like the guy isn't incapable of understanding things form a human's point of view. That's...possibly a good thing? Too soon to tell.
"If the whole space and ship thing ever becomes an issue, let me know, by the way. That was a real offer." He's no mage or god but science and engineering are things he's pretty good at. In this place full of extraordinary people it pays dividends to have a niche to fill. That and it's an excuse not to answer the last question immediately. Gives Jim a moment to think.
"No don't...don't bother him about it. It's no fault of his and I'll get used to it eventually. Was the shock more than anything that hit hard." He doesn't like it, but he's dealt with worse.
no subject
If there are Frost Giants around, he might need to know about that. It could have been in Kirk's own world, though, he supposes, knowing little about it.
His frown softens at the offer, dissolving into something more like a weary smile. "I will pass that information along to Thor. Unfortunately, I will be unable to keep an eye on our ship in the world I come from. It...actually, I suspect it has been destroyed, but I dare to hope there were some survivors." Thor included, he hopes. It would be very like Thanos to slay one brother and deliberately leave the other alive. He was obsessed with equilibrium.
"But it was destroyed under enemy fire, not through any engineering fault. I would not request weaponry from another dimension. It's not my place, for one, and for another I suspect even the best firepower the multiverse has to offer would only buy a little time. Some battles cannot be won by fighting."
His own coffee cup is now empty, and he looks into it as if he can't decide whether he wants a refill or not. His fingers tap the edge of the cup idly, and he hums under his breath. "If you're quite sure. I'm not sure how my brother would react to the resemblance, now that I think of it. It might disturb him, as well. Or he might shrug it off as he does so many odd coincidences."
"For whatever it's worth, I am not unimpressed by your diplomacy." Something sly creeps back into his smile again. "Would you like one of these croissants? I cannot possibly finish them all."
no subject
"Reynard North's the resident winter spirit of the Nexus. He gets some pretty special powers during the season but he also becomes kind of a fickle asshole round that time. I've learned to try and stay on his good side." They're friends the rest of the year, but it's difficult to deal with him during Winter.
Talking about the potential destruction of Loki's ship and his people is disheartening and a reminder for Jim to keep a careful watch on things getting into his world from the Nexus. After the potentially catastrophic situations they've already faced the last thing anyone need sis another power-drunk despot.
"If he gets worried about it, you can tell him I guess. I'll try not to give him reason to though. No promises on my...oh. Right. So, uh. There's actually two of me in the Nexus. He doesn't know about Thor yet." Three, actually, but Jim doesn't know about his older self and it's probably for the best he doesn't right now. This is enough to keep sorted."We look the same, but he grew out a beard for differentiating himself so it's kind of hard to miss him. I'll have to warn him."
no subject
He's not sure if that means this is someone he ought to introduce himself to or someone he ought to avoid at all costs. A Jotun ought to get along well enough with a winter spirit, except Loki very much prefers to be in charge of as much of his surroundings as possible. And if he is as irascible as Kirk suggests, there is no question Loki will annoy him. He routinely upsets even the pleasant and sweet-tempered.
Maybe he'd better see what Harley knows of this spirit.
He takes the news of Jim's alternate without a blink. It's not a surprise, in a multiversal Nexus, although it's sort of interesting that the two of them get along. "I would recommend that, yes. My brother is terminally friendly, and sometimes he misses some subtle nuances of social interaction. He would not be deliberately unkind, though. He is a well-meaning oaf."
Whereas Loki deliberately ignores subtle nuances of social interaction whenever it suits him, and has rarely been described as well-meaning.
no subject
"My counterpart's about two years in my past though some things are different between us. I'm sure I can't enforce this request, but I"d appreciate it if you didn't tell him anything you find out about me. We're trying not to fuck his timeline over too badly." He'll have to warn his bearded companion about Thor as soon as he's done here. Better not to wait on this kind of a scare.
Jim's picking at one of the pastries offered his way. They're good but he's not really hungry even despite not actually sitting face to face with Thor again. Getting used to the coincidence is going to take some time. The implications of it still settle on old, deep wounds.
"He seemed like a pretty decent guy. Are all gods 'a bit arrogant' or is that just human perception?"
no subject
"So much can happen in two years," he murmurs his understanding. "I will do my best to comply with your request."
He wouldn't want anyone telling a younger alternate of him all the madness that lies in store for him. He absolutely understands. However, being a god of mischief, he can't promise anything. Still, what he can and has offered is a good faith effort. Unless a good reason comes along, he won't betray any secrets to the other Kirk. Besides, there are always better pranks to be played.
Loki chuckles at the question. Was that a backhanded comment, or just a statement of fact? "I do not know all gods," he says. "But I would venture to say arrogance runs in my family, on Father's side."
no subject
A big part of that is his projecting his own assumptions based on similarities he finds in the god to people he knows but that's hardly Loki's fault.
"Then yeah, he seems like a pretty decent guy, arrogance aside. And I imagine it gets pretty easy to be arrogant when you're statistically stronger than 99% of the people around you, even if you don't mean it." One doesn't need physical strength to be arrogant, of course. Jim's been accused of it himself and he's quite used to being one of the physically weakest in any given room.
no subject
"By most measures, his mistakes and transgressions are lesser than mine, but without intervention, he might have become the monster I am accused of being. And that would be a tragedy." An ambiguous statement. Almost like Loki's taking credit for doing bad things so Thor didn't have to. Light can't exist without Darkness, after all. Or can it?
"But no. Now he is a friend to mortals and a shepherd to his people, and that is fitting." He takes a bite of the pastry he's been playing with, savoring it quietly, and picks the crumbs up off the table, fastidious as a cat.
"I appreciate your attempt to give me the benefit of the doubt, by the way. I will not forget that."