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smartass_captainThe night Sam Kirk walks into the Kirk family farmhouse his little brother throws a fucking beer bottle at his face. He misses. If he'd hit, the next several years might not have happened.
Jim is twenty years old and his life is a fucking mess.
He's no longer in the goddamn hospital every other month, but still in mandatory therapy until he ages out of the system on his 21st birthday. His therapist has worked with him since. Well. Since he got mandated one by the University of Iowa's children's hospital when they brought him home and nursed him back from the brink of being starved to death. Sam isn't here about Tarsus though. He's here because he heard little Jimmy just got out of a stint in county for petty theft.
Why's a guy stealing bread in this day and age? Jim doesn't give him a satisfactory answer. He can't. There isn't one. He'd been better until he'd left his personal device at home for a weekend boke trip. Without his meal schedule Jim can't function. But see, his body doesn't tell him when he's hungry anymore either, so Jim hadn't noticed until it was day three and he started hurting. All sense left him. Next thing he knows he's sitting in a jail cell being watched while he eats the food they gave him because anyone can see Jim Kirk is still too thin. Jim hates it. That look of fucking pity.
He was home and on his fourth beer of the evening when his fucking older brother strides in like he hasn't been gone for the last damn near decade of Jim's life.
"Sober up. I want you to come into town with me tomorrow and take a test." Sam had said. Jim thinks he told his brother to fuck off. He thinks he tried, but he might have stormed off so the other didn't see him break down into tears. He dodges Sam for three days before they bond over noon breakfast talking about when their mom finally found out about and ditched Frank. Sam asks where Winona sent him then, since neither of them believes for a second she stayed Earthside to raise him herself.
Jim lies.
But the lie works. And so he lets Sam drive them into town chattering the whole time about Starfleet. He wants Jim to take an aptitude test. If he passes, well. Dear ol' big brother's gonna whisk him away to San Francisco so they can enlist together. Sam got in, you see. Second attempt, so maybe Jimmy won't be going with him Right away.
"Jim." Jim corrects him. He's toying with the idea of maybe letting Sam talk him into this, but he's not forgetting the last damn near decade so easily. Not forgiving it yet, either. He tells himself he'll take the stupid test to shut his brother up. And hell, maybe he'll even beat his 'big bro' and pass on a first try. He aces it, hangover and all. Sam seems real keen on congratulating himself for giving Jim pointers the last couple days and Jim doesn't argue much.
A change of scenery seems like a decent idea.
All he wants to take fits into a single duffel bag he tosses into the back of Sam's beater of a truck and they make for San Francisco...
Jim is twenty years old and his life is a fucking mess.
He's no longer in the goddamn hospital every other month, but still in mandatory therapy until he ages out of the system on his 21st birthday. His therapist has worked with him since. Well. Since he got mandated one by the University of Iowa's children's hospital when they brought him home and nursed him back from the brink of being starved to death. Sam isn't here about Tarsus though. He's here because he heard little Jimmy just got out of a stint in county for petty theft.
Why's a guy stealing bread in this day and age? Jim doesn't give him a satisfactory answer. He can't. There isn't one. He'd been better until he'd left his personal device at home for a weekend boke trip. Without his meal schedule Jim can't function. But see, his body doesn't tell him when he's hungry anymore either, so Jim hadn't noticed until it was day three and he started hurting. All sense left him. Next thing he knows he's sitting in a jail cell being watched while he eats the food they gave him because anyone can see Jim Kirk is still too thin. Jim hates it. That look of fucking pity.
He was home and on his fourth beer of the evening when his fucking older brother strides in like he hasn't been gone for the last damn near decade of Jim's life.
"Sober up. I want you to come into town with me tomorrow and take a test." Sam had said. Jim thinks he told his brother to fuck off. He thinks he tried, but he might have stormed off so the other didn't see him break down into tears. He dodges Sam for three days before they bond over noon breakfast talking about when their mom finally found out about and ditched Frank. Sam asks where Winona sent him then, since neither of them believes for a second she stayed Earthside to raise him herself.
Jim lies.
But the lie works. And so he lets Sam drive them into town chattering the whole time about Starfleet. He wants Jim to take an aptitude test. If he passes, well. Dear ol' big brother's gonna whisk him away to San Francisco so they can enlist together. Sam got in, you see. Second attempt, so maybe Jimmy won't be going with him Right away.
"Jim." Jim corrects him. He's toying with the idea of maybe letting Sam talk him into this, but he's not forgetting the last damn near decade so easily. Not forgiving it yet, either. He tells himself he'll take the stupid test to shut his brother up. And hell, maybe he'll even beat his 'big bro' and pass on a first try. He aces it, hangover and all. Sam seems real keen on congratulating himself for giving Jim pointers the last couple days and Jim doesn't argue much.
A change of scenery seems like a decent idea.
All he wants to take fits into a single duffel bag he tosses into the back of Sam's beater of a truck and they make for San Francisco...
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Date: 2025-02-24 12:39 am (UTC)Oh holy fuck.
The man just drug him down an inch or so on the bed like he weighed nothing and now is just looking at Jim like he's the reason the sun comes up in the morning. Jim can't breathe. He can't look away. The leg in the crook of Spock's arm starts trembling again. For just a split second Jim feels heat prick at the corners of his eyes. His voice stutters.
Hitches. Jim's back arches up off the bed as far as he can move when Spock finally moves to seal the deal. He tips his chin back. "That's it--!" His eyes are thrown wide, his voice finally found again. He breathes out a couple shaky chuckles, exultant to finally be here. To get this.
"Oh holy shit. Holy shit Spock--" Jim's hands once more seek any point they can reach. He's dragging his heated touch all over the Vulcan's body. Trying to pull him closer.
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Date: 2025-02-24 01:03 am (UTC)He lets himself drop forward, landing on his forearm to keep from crushing Jim with his weight, and puts himself well within reach as he keeps on with his slow movement, pausing briefly once he bottoms out, giving them both a moment to relax and keep going without cracking immediately—Spock in particular needs to breathe a moment, even himself out, the tight heat of Jim around him overwhelming to say the least.
He murmurs soothingly by Jim's ear, though he does not attempt to shush him. The volume is not an issue, but Spock cannot help but allow himself the affections he has been holding in all this time, has been clawing across shattered glass to keep in his mouth, in his throat, in his chest.
He will do so until Jim no longer exudes such surprise that someone could feel such a way for him. He mouths kisses along the line of Jim's jaw, voice low and throaty. There comes a point where he cannot help but murmur in Golic instinctively, and it is around that point where he gives up on taking a second to breathe and draws his hips back slowly only to snap them forward again so hard that Jim's back slides across the bed slightly, a little closer to the edge of the pillow. His voice chokes mid-word, overwhelmed, and he switches to supporting himself on one hand while the other cradles Jim's jaw so he can keep watching his face as he continues, pace not quite punishing but still hard and fast, a culmination of both eagerness and desiring to, illogically, 'make up for lost time.'
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Date: 2025-02-24 04:41 am (UTC)In fact, the sex isn't what makes Jim pause hardly at all. It's the feather soft murmurs breathed into his ear. Calming, not patronizing. Earnest, not mocking. How Spock adjusts everything just to put more of himself in Jim's fevered reach. The soft kisses trailed along the line of his jaw. All of that has Jim choking up a little, that heat back at the corners of his eyes. He's terrified he's about to start crying when Spock suddenly decides he's done holding on.
"Fucking hell--!" Jim's got one leg trapped in Spock's embrace, the other half off the bed. He has nothing to brace himself with as the snap of Spock's hips sends Jim sliding up the bedding swiftly enough to make the fabric whine high pitched and swift. Leaves his back warm and red from the friction. And even like This. Spock's hand cups his jaw. Lovingly.
Love. Spock loves--
"Oh hell, oh fuck--!!" Jim's voice carries to the walls. Heard still even over the slap of skin on skin. The creak of the bed. One of Jim's hands anchors itself on the sheets to keep himself from sliding further. The other grips tight to Spock's forearm.
For Jim, the rest of the world may not exist. But to their neighbors they are unbelievably loud. Loud enough that when a certain Samuel Kirk comes down to demand an apology from the two of them, he's startled into stopping well before he can bang on the door and ruin this moment.
He hisses a few choice swears in whispered vitriol. Jim's got no idea, of course. His entire world is Spock leaning over him with that soft look on his face. On the rock of their hips together, the twisting coil of warmth in Jim's guts that he lives for.
"God, fuck! Yes~!"
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Date: 2025-02-24 01:16 pm (UTC)Every part of him aches with want, feels like there is only heat residing in him, hotter than he has ever felt; he moans Jim's name into his ear as he fucks him, as he draws his thumb slowly along Jim's jaw, his cheek, repetitive and soothing.
"Follow my breathing," he murmurs, and while his own respiration is not perfectly even, at points a little ragged, Jim needs something to focus on because if he is this wild already, when things are about to get worse (better), he might shake apart entirely in Spock's arms.
He starts to lean back just enough to shift their positions, but the thing is. The thing is, Vulcans have impeccable hearing, extremely keen. So while Jim does not notice his brother in the hall cursing his impotent rage, Spock does. Spock does and he shifts all at once, head not turning but gaze flicking toward the door as he rocks back onto his knees, the hand that had been supporting himself slipping to rest at the small of Jim's back to drag him into Spock's lap properly so he can snap his hips up into him instead, giving Spock more leverage, altering the angle of his thrusts just enough to glide along his prostate every movement—
"—I want to hear you say my name." The words scrape out of his throat and over his tongue, rough and desperate, and that much is not at all for the spite he has toward Samuel Kirk. That is purely for himself.
Not I would like, not would you please, but I want.
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Date: 2025-02-24 06:23 pm (UTC)Jim adjusts when Spock moves. He pulls back and slides a hand to the small of Jim's back--Jim arches it to better let him find him wherever he wants to touch. He's getting a workout like this but it's so fucking good. He even manages to shake out a breathless little chuckle and a cheeky quirk of a smile before Spock absolutely ruins him.
It shifts to a low noise of surprise to be pulled down the bed again only for Spock to punch a sharper moan out of Jim's mouth even he wasn't ready for. As every thrust jolts down his spine sharper than electricity. Intense pleasure, heat, and that fucking voice at the same time, still managing to be heard over Jim's cries. Jim's not sure how he doesn't white-out on the spot.
It still takes him a couple of gulped-down breaths to manage anything coherent. The first two times all he manages is to half sob, half moan in the space between them. His voice is breaking when he finally shudders out--
"D-don't stop--! Spock p-please--!"
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Date: 2025-02-25 06:43 am (UTC)Spock does not, in fact, stop. He does moan, burying it in the crook of Jim's neck and cutting it off with another catch of teeth just behind his ear. He does relent on their positioning though, if only because he wants to be able to go harder, faster, with the use of his hands.
But perhaps he is a little over-zealous: there comes a point where, as Jim's back once again slides along the mattress from the force of their movement, his head gets dangerously close to slamming into the headboard at speed.
It does not end up doing so, however. Instead, Spock darts a hand forward and puts it directly in the way so that Jim's head bumps up against his palm instead. Then he presses kisses all along Jim's neck and throat, murmuring a quiet but earnest apology for the fact that his recklessness could have caused potential real harm depending on just how hard his head would have been hit. He strokes his thumb across Jim's hairline, over his temple with a flashfire bit of affection, and slips his other hand between them to curl fingers around the base of Jim's cock.
I love using this icon for it's Better purpose
Date: 2025-02-26 03:14 pm (UTC)Spock gets treated to his name gasped out again for it, whined out when he pulls away to reposition once more, and then Jim has no space for words. He's too busy holding on. Until Spock overdoes it and Jim's grip on the sheet slips. He slides up the bed with another whine of the fabric against his reddened skin. Jim grunts a startled little noise to suddenly have Spock over him, his head hitting the man's hand.
It's the closest thing to a pause they get as Spock slows long enough to apologize while he nuzzles close. This far gone Jim doesn't even realize his eyes are wet with emotion. He's mushing his cheek into Spock's hand. Gasping for enough air to catch his breath. Confused, honestly, why he's being apologized to in the moment.
"S'good. Spock it's so good, you're good~" Jim murmurs in between breaths. If Spock is going to lean over then Jim is going to cling to him. Maybe that's even for the best. He won't slide far if he's latched on to Spock. But his legs jolt and tremble when slightly cooler fingers wrap around his weeping cock. All Jim can manage by now is a startled choking noise that grows in pitch. Jim's grip tightens as if he has to hold on for dear life. It does mean he's clenching down a little on Spock too but at an urging he will find himself enough to relax again. Just for a little longer...
honestly i laugh every time, it's so good
Date: 2025-02-26 04:24 pm (UTC)Simple to ascertain, simple to enact, simple to systematically move from point A to B to C to take Jim apart with laser precision. The sound of his name on Jim's lips stokes his desire even higher: everything is so slick, he can feel characteristic tightness coiling at the base of his abdomen, Jim is overwhelmed, whining, tightening around him—
—Not yet. Jim requested that Spock, quote, 'fuck him stupid,' and while Spock has to intuit the actual definition of the colloquialism he believes he understands the assignment, as it were, and as such he has not completed his extremely pleasurable task. Jim is also exhibiting signs of a measure of emotional... Something, Spock is not sure, as Jim is clearly indicating he is not in distress.
All the same, he knows how to make sure that when Jim does finish, he gets what he desperately desires.
Spock stops moving.
He does not move away, does not give Jim even the slightest chance to think he is leaving: in fact, though his hips still with great effort and self-control, he leans closer, brushing his thumb over Jim's cheek where it rests and nudging their foreheads together, attempting to catch his breath, to bring himself back down so that he can finish this how Jim deserves.
"Follow my breathing," he repeats softly, dragging his own respiration to something slower and even for Jim's sake. His other hand lets go only to slowly (albeit damply) stroke fingers over Jim's stomach. He watches his expression hawk-like, making sure he is not pushing too far and is not doing anything Jim does not want.
It will be better, more heated, and more pleasurable for Jim should he take a moment to relax so that he has to build back up again, but it relies on Jim being able to handle it. If Spock must start again right away, he will do so and easily.
GOOD i'm glad i'm not the only one
Date: 2025-02-26 05:20 pm (UTC)Spock stopped moving. They'd just been getting back into rhythm after the shushed apologies. Jim's chin jerks down but Spock is there. A warm weight settled over him and then foreheads touching. Something he's never experienced before Spock. It draws a confused but wobbly little smile out of him. A breathless laugh that's all air and no sound. He leans up and captures Spock's lips in a desperate, needy kiss only to be told to breathe as soon as he's parted to suck in another gasp.
"Y...yeah I c'n...I can do that. Is everything okay?" Why did he stop though??? Jim's not complaining exactly--not yet at any rate. He's confused. The overwhelming affection would prickle unpleasantly over him were it coming from anyone ELSE but with Spock? Jim just offers that same, stupid little smile. Whatever he needs, Jim will try to give it.
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Date: 2025-02-26 05:31 pm (UTC)After that kiss ends he continues to breathe for Jim to follow but brushes his lips along Jim's cheekbone, his jaw, his chin, and his lips. The question gives him a brief pause before he tips his head back up from where he's pressed another kiss to the hollow of Jim's throat to look at him.
"The situation is optimal," he says. "You requested that I 'Fuck you stupid.' I am complying with that request with the best method I know how to employ." He pauses again, gives him another soft kiss, and keeps brushing his fingers soothingly over his skin. "Please trust the process," he says, unaware of how silly that might sound in most sexual situations were it anyone but Jim, who knew what he was getting into with how Spock communicates, hearing it. "Please inform me when you are able to breathe easily and you feel slightly more relaxed. I will show you my intent then."
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Date: 2025-02-26 05:54 pm (UTC)He can't help but to whine a little. Squirm as if he could fuck Himself against Spock from this angle but he doesn't have near the range of motion from this position to do so even if the other couldn't stop him with a single hand easily even if he had such range.
"Y-yeah?" Yeah, that sounds like something Jim would say. And any other time he'd laugh to hear Spock say it, especially in that deep rumbling husk his voice has taken on the more turned on Spock gets. And Then it dawns on him what Spock is doing. This time his whine is a little louder, but not by much. Jim's voice is giving out the longer they drag this on. "Y're gonna hold out on me..?" Jim whines but this is clearly his dick talking because Jim also doesn't fight Spock any on this.
He curls his arms tighter around Spock's neck and shoulders and hauls himself up to curl as close to the other as he can. Foreheads touching. Just trying to settle down a little and breathe. Every now and then his hips twitch without his consent but the frequency drops little by little.
Sorry to their neighbors who might get the wrong idea that they're done making people regret being near them. The reprieve is only a few minutes before Jim tips his chin back again and sighs long and low.
"...'m good. I'm." Jim swallows. "I'm okay now."
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Date: 2025-02-26 06:06 pm (UTC)No, this is important for now, and though it remains difficult to resist the whining desperation in Jim's voice, Spock manages. Only because he has to in order to make this perfect for Jim, but he still counts it as a success.
He stays close for Jim to hold onto for support, to keep himself in reach, to brush their noses each time he gives Jim another slow kiss, though that much is simply a byproduct of movement and not purposeful.
Finally, after a few moments that feel like hours, Jim sighs out his answer and Spock nods. He slides his hand up higher, pressed to the center of Jim's chest to both hold him down and hold him in place so he does not slide again and Spock can free his other hand for other Activities, such as dragging back downward.
He draws his hips back agonizingly slowly, exhales slowly, then snaps them forward hard and fast, rough but not cruel—maybe it is a little funny that the moan Spock lets out sounds punched out of him like he is the one being railed directly into the mattress, but either way he keeps up that pace, looking down into Jim's face to watch his expression, dragging his hips up one-handed for the optimal angle to go right back to dragging against his prostate unrelentingly with each movement, and then wrapping his fingers around Jim's cock again to stroke him, thumb rubbing over the head, gliding over the slit.
"I still want to hear you," he breathes out, just as rough as the rest, "you are beautiful like this."
Affectionate words to go along with the heavy intensity of the physical. Trying to overwhelm him indeed.
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Date: 2025-02-26 08:49 pm (UTC)Jim sighs to feel Spock moving. And there might have been words. Encouragement, Spock's name...whatever that intent was it's gone.
"..!!" All Jim manages is the smallest of sounds although his mouth is dropped open. It's Spock moaning for the both of them. Spock pistoning into Jim like he needs it to live. The bed creaks beneath them. It's Spock's hand keeping Jim from sliding more than even a little bit and Jim knows now that if he hadn't he'd be slamming into the wall. And that's what Spock had done earlier, Jim realizes all of a sudden. Jim chokes up again. Honest to god sniffles a little. He'd chuckle but he doesn't have the breath to spare.
Does Spock know how ruined Jim is for Life now? How no one ever has treated him even halfway this well? And this is only the first time they've ever fucked.
Oh god, this is only the first time--
"Nnnnnhhh--!!" Jim squirms desperately against Spock, desperate for the blinding pleasure arcing through him. Every thrust jolts up his spine, sends his cock throbbing untouched but Spock is there too again curling fingers around him, teasing the head, stroking him. Every breath he takes fights against the pressure of Spock's hand holding him in place against this onslaught of pleasure. Because Spock is watching him so intently he will see Jim's eyes focus again and flit to meet his when he all but groans out the demand in that low rumble of his.
It's the affection that brings tears to Jims eyes, finally spilling over the sides and down his face. He's not distressed, no. But he is overwhelmed by a love he has never known once in his life. A devotion he has no words to answer for. And he's being planted into Spock's bed while it happens. He tries to talk but it comes out one long run on word. Pleading, begging, demanding relief. Release. For this to never end. But amidst the incoherency Jim does gasp and manage,
"Loveyou I love you please Spock--!"
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Date: 2025-02-27 05:44 am (UTC)Spock does startle when Jim cries, something almost frantic clawing up his throat. But it becomes clear that it is not a negative reaction and relief floods through him instead. He continues on, listening to Jim's almost reedy voice, rolls his hips back for another sharp snap.
Jim loves him. Jim would not lie about such a thing, therefore it must be true. His eyes widen slightly as he stares down at him, swallowing thickly before he switches back to holding Jim down with his body weight, right hand snapping up to thread fingers with Jim's, pressing that to the bed as well, breath hitching. The left continues its current task of stroking Jim in time with his thrusts.
"I too love you," he manages, as ragged as the rest, "I am close." That last, desperate because he wants—needs—Jim to reach completion before Spock does. "Show me."
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Date: 2025-02-27 09:56 am (UTC)And this is Spock, is the thing.
He doesn't say Anything he doesn't mean. There's a sense of security there Jim's never had before. In Knowing that someone loves him. Hell, Spock's even holding his hand in the cheesiest romantic move Jim's ever seen and if he hadn't already been emotionally drunk and overwhelmed he would be by that simple little gesture. The twitch of his smile is a blink-and-you'll-miss-it flicker before the next thrust leaves him making that reedy little moan again.
Jim has just enough presence of mind to squeeze Spock's hand back in appreciation for the shift in position. His right hand releases the bunched up sheet he'd been clinging to so he can anchor it on a broad shoulder instead. The thighs bracketing Spock twitch and tremble the way they had before. That demand on top of everything else just does Jim in right then and there.
He has those couple seconds of clawing, climbing warmth before he's shaking apart in ragged gasps. He's spilling over the top of Spock's fingers, painting both of their stomachs in his seed. All the while he's held down by Spock's weight. His hand in Jim's. Steady even while Jim trembles and quakes. It's not until the crest of his release is over that he croaks out Spock's name in something akin to devoted wonder.
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Date: 2025-02-28 02:45 am (UTC)The increased tightness when Jim reaches release, when his body tenses, drags a low, pleasured his through Spock's teeth and he chokes on another moan just after, overcome—he snaps his hips hard one more time, burying his face in Jim's neck and rasping out his name as he comes bottomed out inside him, fine muscles trembling even as he finally stills, both of them covered in sweat (though on Spock it is due to the constant contact with Jim's heated skin). He presses an apologetic kiss to a bite from before, letting the fingers of his clean hand stroke slowly up and down Jim's side to help him come down comfortably, to feel the care and adoration with which Spock is treating him.
He does not desire to pull back yet, so he does not. He does, however, lift his head again to kiss him on the mouth, slow and easy.
"I request that you inform me of your comfort levels and any changes to them."
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Date: 2025-02-28 03:19 am (UTC)This? Was really cute. He's here for it. It's earnest and sweet and definitely probably not horny as all hell in ways he doesn't understand.
He'll accept that kiss from Spock too. Soft, affectionate, but it's still Jim Kirk so he does suck gently at Spock's lower lip and graze it with his teeth ever so slightly when he pulls back to lea his head against the pillows.
"....So. We're g'nna push the beds together after this, right?"
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Date: 2025-03-01 05:10 am (UTC)Instead he shifts them both into a more comfortable position, holding Jim close against his chest and rolling them onto their sides.
He blinks at the inquiry, pausing but not in a negative way. "Yes," he settles on, "I am aware you enjoy physical contact. I do also when it is with you. As such, it is prudent to ensure we share a sleeping space. We will do so once we have rested here for some time."
Now, after everything, he feels overwhelmed. He is happy though, he finds, which is most important.
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Date: 2025-03-01 02:43 pm (UTC)"Easy enough to pull apart for a night....mmh, if it gets t'be too much for you too." Because regardless of how much Jim wants to never stop touching this Vulcan, he's more than aware that Touch was one of those things that makes Spock different to Jim. And this? It's a whole lot after the damn near Nothing they've done since the start of the term.
Jim can't remember ever snuggling up close to someone for Comfort. He'd thought it might be too Much, too stifling, but instead he just seems to melt against Spock. Twining their legs, keeping them as close as can be managed. All the tension bleeds out of him. Truth be told it's a Lot for Jim, too, who has no frame of reference for even the dregs of whatever emotions Spock feeds him through all the points they're touching. Easier to just let himself be held close and safe and to drift off into the most restful Sleep Jim will have ever had in his life.
No tossing or turning. No being awake at odd hours when Spock has finished resting or meditating. Just plain Out.